A couple in the park embracing and holding hands - Romantic Relationship in a Sober Living concept image

When it comes to getting involved in a romantic relationship while in recovery, it is almost never recommended. This is the case for individuals who are spending time in sober living homes for two main reasons. The first reason is due to the fact that it can be very difficult for individuals to maintain their sobriety when they are deeply in love with someone who may also be an alcoholic or addict. They may also serve as a reminder of a time when your addiction was at its peak, which can be extremely triggering for someone who is trying their best to stay clean and sober.

The second reason could be because if you do end up having a romantic relationship with another resident at the sober living home, if it happens to go sideways for any reason, it could potentially jeopardize your entire experience at that sober living home. This is especially true if one of you ends up relapsing during the relationship.

Here are some of the reasons why romantic relationships are not recommended in sober living homes:

There is No Privacy

One of the hardest things about living in a sober living home is the lack of privacy. 

For people who have been in sober living homes, they know firsthand how difficult it can be to maintain a healthy relationship when you are constantly being monitored. 

It can also be hard to be emotionally intimate with your partner because you are always aware that there could be cameras on you at any time. While having no privacy can be a good thing when trying to stay clean, it’s not ideal when you are in an exclusive relationship with someone. This can lead to feelings of vulnerability, as well as, mistrust between partners which can eventually lead to breakups, fights or worse.

It Can Be a Distraction

If you plan on starting a romantic relationship while you are living in a sober living home, this can be seen as a distraction and it is not very conducive to your recovery, which should be your main reason for being there. For individuals in a sober living home, they should all be working towards the same goal, which is recovering from their addiction and staying clean. It could be seen as selfish to put your personal goals before those of the group in a sober living home.

Many people who live in sober living homes have to work or go to school during the day, which means that they don’t have time for anything but their recovery and household responsibilities. This can make it hard for them to find the time or energy for anything else. There is also the risk of codependence if you date someone who is also in recovery. Ultimately, this can lead to relapse, which defeats the whole purpose of why you’re there in the first place!

It Can Lead to Relapse

Romantic relationships can lead to relapse for individuals who are trying to maintain their sobriety. For example, if the person in the relationship is drinking alcohol or using drugs, it can be a huge temptation for you and make it difficult to stay on track with your goals. 

Even if they are not doing these things but are spending time with people that do drink or use drugs, this can have an impact on them and cause them to want to do it as well. 

Additionally, sometimes people feel like they need more excitement in their life and get into a romantic relationship just because they want something different. Unfortunately, this does not mean that it is a good idea by any means.

It Can Be a Source of Conflict

When someone is in a sober living home, it is important for them to stay focused on their recovery and make wise decisions. One decision that can be detrimental to one’s sobriety is getting involved in a romantic relationship. 

This can be problematic because there are two people who are in the relationship and both of them are trying to recover from addiction. 

Some of the problems that can arise from this type of relationship include jealousy, resentment, or abuse. The best way to avoid these types of problems is by staying away from relationships altogether while in treatment.

It Can Be a Source of Stress

One of the main reasons why romantic relationships should not be pursued in a sober living home is that it can be a source of stress. When you are in a relationship, you are always worried about what the other person might think or do. 

You are constantly trying to please them and make them happy, which is much more difficult to do when you live in a sober living home. 

Also, at a sober living home, there is a lot less privacy than for people who live on their own. So there is more of a chance of someone finding out about your relationship with the other person and judging you for it.

It Can Be a Source of Temptation

Another reason is that when in a sober living home, a relationship can be an unnecessary source of drama. Unfortunately, this is often the case for people who are addicted to substances and/or alcohol.

They may not want their significant other to spend time with others and they may get jealous easily when they see them talking or flirting with others. Another reason not to have a romantic relationship in a sober living home is that the person could be using their partner as an excuse for staying clean or sober. Ultimately, when you are in a sober living home, your first priority should always be to take care of yourself.

Learn More About Sober Living Homes With the Help of North Jersey Recovery Center

While it might not seem like a big deal to get involved in a romantic relationship in a sober living home, there are actually some major downsides to doing so. If you are in a sober living situation, you are there for a specific reason. Your main focus should be on healing yourself and doing everything in your power to help yourself recover from drugs and/or alcohol.

Contact North Jersey Recovery Center today to learn more about life in sober living homes in Northern New Jersey!